State of The Elliott

Our gracious benefactors James and Dylan switched over their server, which had cut me off from access to the site since May (or possibly like a week) but I wanted to check to see if everything was in working order. It is.

We've got a lot of catching up to do. I used to complain that my folks have no pictures of me as a child. It's because two children eat up all your picture taking time.

This first picture I think really defines my life at the moment.We know wside that's from.

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This picture will explain why I have that big red dot on my forehead. I am not actually the most devout convert to Hindu ever. The Conrad has the easiest laugh ever. Long time readers (also known as waiters, or possibly sufferers) will recall that the Elliott was very stingy with the smiles. His brother makes up for it in spades. He also thinks Elliott is the funniest creature to walk the earth. Thus, being who I am, I feel compelled to be funnier than my eldest. Sadly, Daddy with a big suction cup stuck to his head is still not as funny as Elliott doing just about anything.We know what side that's from.

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In case we failed to mention it, as of August 10th, the Elliott is now three years old! Seen here with the #1 Arch Rival of the Elliott, Weston, who was born a week later than him. We did a co-birthday at a local park which was a rousing success. The boys even asked all the attendees to give them books which they then donated to their Day Care. Of course, it wasn't their idea, but in a stunning rebellion against the three-year-old credo of "MINE MINE MINE!", they didn't make a fuss at all. In fact, Elliott had a blast distributing the books amongst the various classrooms he and Weston have occupied over the past three years. I was very, very proud.w what side that's froGHT!

The Elliott did a performance piece at the park the other 95 degree day, interpreting the cries of the large bear statue for us. He's been obsessed with bears. Every night I need to assure him that the natural territory for bears is not SE Portland. I'm careful to point out that, were any bears to wander into SE Portland, the odds of them finding his house, let alone his room, are very, very slim. He seems to think I am possibly in the employ of the bear lobby, and may be lying to him on their behalf, as he doesn't demonstrate much faith in my claims.e know what side that's from.

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Before you start complaining about the lack of photographic Conrad evidence, it's really quite hard to take a picture of him. He's been army crawling for over a month now. He's always on the go. At 7 months, he started pulling himself up on the edge of the bathtub, the ottoman, and his crib. He doesn't do real crawling, he just drags himself around using very little leg motion. If you've ever seen a zombie movie, there's always a zombie that can't use its legs and just pulls itself around using arms alone. It's like having a tiny one of those, only he's more hungry for shoelaces than braaaaaains. It's kind of creepy, really.We know what side that's from.

fro RIGHT!

They Really Do Very Little in the First 3 Months.

For heaven's sake, stop gasping. It's not that remarkable. For the record, we didn't start posting for the Elliott until he was 6 months old, so actually we're ahead of the curve here. It's all in the spin.

Besides, there's no point in posting new pics because we had the same baby twice.

Thank goodness they now look like this or I'd be completely lost. I feel this picture pretty much sums up why no updates for three months.

OK, So Not Quite the Unveiling I Had in Mind.

So we were going to do a grand new site unveiling with a new URL and all that, but time has not permitted.

This is not why we haven't updated in 6 months. That distinction rests with a massive basement remodel (and mostly laziness). This is why we won't update for the next 6 months.

Stats: 9 lbs 3 oz. - Blue eyes. Red Hair. 22 inches long. Mary Poppins thinks he is practically perfect in every way.

Birthday: January 26th, 3:45 p.m. Only required 6 hours of labor and came out the proper exit, rather than the doggie door. Thank goodness he was small.

He's very loud. The Elliott was not this loud. That or the Elliott operates on frequencies that were already destroyed by my Navy days and the Conrad operates on previously unsullied cochlear cilia. He's going to correct that problem in very short order.

He's beefy. At three days old he can climb a 45 degree tummy to suck on your neck using just his legs.

Ok, if I write more, my father is going to kill me because we're frantically finishing the basement, but I had to get this out to the Myrrh-bearing masses gathered around our doorstep.

One more thing: We're changing the name of the site to something, but we haven't decided yet. In honor of our return to the web, please send me a suggestion (or anything else) to WDavidShepherd AAAAAAT google mail (That's @gmail.com for you non-robots. They've become very tricky lately.) Nothing with "Boy" in it because it turns out that's a distinction shared with a lot of gay porn sites!

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Folks, I'm doing something of a redesign for the big recovery. I'm testing my comment fields. Feel free to enter something. Be the first on your block!

EDIT: The spambots found us very quickly. I'm killing comments until I have time to put up a robot-proof fence.

And we're back!

Dylan, Former Ex-Microsoftie, got us a new copy of Frontpage for Christmas (although we paid him back so he still owes us a present). We are back in business. More to come soon.

Just wanted to let everybody know we're back in action.

Wait until you see what we've been up to for the last 6 months! We've been very, very busy!

Not Again?!?

It appears that whatever ailment was afflicting my computer a few months ago was simply in remission, rather than being completely eradicated. It's too bad, because I'm a big fan of problems that mysteriously fix themselves with no effort on my part. My father will not refute this.

Speaking of which, it's Father's Day, and the boy and I had a lovely time. He gave me a card with otters on it that made me get all teary during breakfast at the Pig n' Pancake. Then Sarah and I bought him a kid-sized table at Target and he helped us put it together. If my G drive ever recovers, there will be links in this paragraph that show pictures of said helping. Until then, you guys get the Indian Head again. I think I need to invest in a new auxiliary hard drive.

After assembling the table, we went to the community pool while Sarah took a nap. The pool was completely full of screaming kids, and the Elliott clung to me like a limpet for the first 15 minutes, just staring and sucking his thumb. I wandered with him around the pool, pointing out that everyone but him was having a wonderful time, and then I showed him how he could push on my forehead and I'd fall over backwards. Seeing Daddy descend into the deep (20" wading area) and return unharmed seemed to convince him that he was in no immediate danger, because he detached his sucker and set out with firm purpose toward the deep end. Had I not picked him up, I believe he would have walked until completely submerged. Some say stupid. I call it bravery. I am ridiculously proud of this sudden burst of independence and self-confidence. We thoroughly enjoyed ourselves for the next hour.

Also, I got a reciprocating saw, so I'm feeling about as manly a Daddy as I have ever felt. A good day.

Releasing the Inner Ninja

Sarah and I have a running argument regarding which of us is more ninja. It's a little known fact* that ninja power can only be passed down from the union of two ninjas. Since Sarah's ninja-ness is questionable at best, I was hoping the Elliott might be spared the terrible burden and responsibility of such awesome power, but a trip to the coast for Mother's Day confirmed that "the invisible art" has indeed been transferred to our young scion. Merely handling a sword-like object immediately unleashed the power! Note how these birds are completely unaware of their impending doom. He gets the invisibility from my side. I was especially impressed when he busted out the ancient art of sand writing. This from a child who still counts from one to five as follows: "two, two, two, two, five". We know what side that's from.

Fortunately, we were able to harness his raw power and no one was injured... this time.

*as in I made it up just now.

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And Then Four Months Happened.

They Really Do Very Little in the First 3 Months.

OK, So Not Quite the Unveiling I Had in Mind.

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And we're back!

Not Again?!?

Releasing the Inner Ninja